Nov 02

Much achoooo abt. nothing!!!!

Have you ever tried to sneeze and talk at the same time?! Coming to think of it.. there isn’t many things a man can really do! You know what I mean? For example, gorrillas are the only beings that can swallow while breathing! => that man cannot! Well so much for the simian ancestry! Well, you people may say, look at Bobby Deol!! Can there be a more bludgeoning evidence for the ancestry theory? I wanted second opinions.. and when I asked the simians that usually come to my house for the round branch meeting, they begged to defer!!! With a flabbergasted look on their face, as if they had just watched an entire rerun of the most famous 101 ways of defying science by Rajnikanth, they shrieked and howled and thumped vehemently denying any part in the current existence of Bobby Deol or his acting skills. Well that matter having rested, shall we now come back to the matter at stake.. Achhooooo!!!! *sniff sniff*
Well, winter bringeth with it more than its share of miseries especially for wretched souls like us! Now being fair and square I did have an option of either coming down with cold or to watch Meghana Naidu gyrate in “Rain”. As sane as I was, I chose for the former! Achewwellllllsssss!!! (it kinda gets boring after a while to sneeze in the same old hackneyed style.. and so I also have been experimenting on innovative and unique ways of grossing myself out).
While people have been running away from me, as if I was Mithun da pr(d)ancing around in a red shirt and khakis from “Classic” [I mean coming to think of it.. I really wonder how people dared to go to a theatre and sit through 3 classic hours of 3rd degree torture of not only watching Mithun mouth out against sex, “hum sex ke khilaaf hain.. yada yada yada yada” on one side, while Ms Naidu and the utterly forgettable caricature of the hero make love like 2 zombies who have come down with a heavy constipation problem!], I was able to muster some time for myself to pen down something to infect all my readers! (assuming that there are some)
Now just how effectively the cold can be passed on through an online blog.. is still under research, as is also the number of ways in which one can sneeze and utter utterly unfathomable words for others to figure out! It gives me great honor to acknowledge that I am the primary researcher and also the main specimen on which these tests are being conducted!
Now.. I know I know.. that you all are considerin’ yourself blessed for being able to be a witness for this phenomenal occurrance! But then, am so sorry, I gotto goshkchkllaskjkslkjkskcchooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!! *sniff* *sniff*

Oct 27

Romance In the Air!!

Well my internet at home has gone busted.. thanks to SBC Yahoo! I have a vague doubt that it has something to do with my negligence towards my books! I am tended to believe that its a conspiracy by them to make me hit the bed with my long forgotten books! And am glad, they did so! Well I won’t really say that I did hit the books again! The devolution (which I want all my readers to believe is the opposite of evolution) doesn’t quite happen that way. Though I did happen to read a beautiful book “Love Story” by Eric Seagel. This actually prompted me to infact list a few of my favorite romantic movies! (Well, actually! Sushma made me watch a rather romantic movie “Bridges of Madison County, and that also had a role to play in this post).
  • You’ve Got Mail :- Probably the one factor that really made me love this movie was Meg Ryan! (I’d also say Tom Hanks.. but I dont’ wanna send out a wrong signal, if u know what I mean.. so let’s take this granted). The witty and taut script, beautiful picturization, and a wonderful story would make any person fall in love with this movie! And the original sound track is just too good! Some of the best numbers of the yesters were relived in this movie!
  • Sweet November :- Apart from the story, it was the expressions and the plethora of emotions that the main protagonists – Charlize Theron, and Keanu Reeves gave out, that had me rooted down till the end of this movie! “only time” – the score by Enya has ever since remained among my favorites!
  • The Bridges of Madison County :- When Sushma strongly suggested this movie, I knew I was in for a roller coaster of emotions! Clint Eastwood and Meryl Streep had me spell bound with their intense talks and emotions! If one wants to realize how much love can hurt, they have to watch this movie!
  • Amelie :- I am not a big connoiseur of foreign movies to be true! But this one movie, I’d say is a must watch! The simplicity of the characters, their idiosyncracies, makes it so believeable that it grows out to be a part of us, by the time the movie ends.
  • An Affair To Remember :- One of the things about classic movies, is that they in no way can be surpassed by the remakes of the later days! This is one such movie that really impressed me for its originality and story!
  • West Side Story:- The same goes with this one too! A musical from the start to the end, this movie is memorable for lot of reasons. The songs, the dance, the picturization, the wonderful acting, .. the list goes on! If you don’t mind a musical, I surely want this to be on top of the list!
  • Notting Hill:- Hugh Grant and Julia Roberts created such a magic with this movie, that I have been made to watch this countless times by a lot of my friends (you know who) whenever we would go to rent movies. Being fair to the movie, it is very catchy and has some really good numbers! The songs are worth having in your collection!
  • Forrest Gump:- What actually qualifies a movie to be a romance for me, is kinda hard to explain. But this movie had made me think a lot about what it was to really love! The movie by itself is more of a single person’s story! What touched me and made me add to the list was the one love he treasured all his life! It was hard for me to believe and yet somehow.. somewhere.. very true!

Oct 27

Best Romantic Numbers in Kannada!

From quite a while since, I have been trying to make a list of kannada songs that I treasure. Being as hopelessly romantic as I am, I thought the best way for me to start would be to list the wonderful romantic numbers that I listen to on any given day and time! I’d rather randomly list them in the first place than chronologically, which would take a lot of time (which is a big deterrent for a blogger like me). Anyways here goes the numbers,
  1. Ravi vermana kunchada kale (An ever green romantic number by the legendary PBS, sadly pictured on Padmapriya and Rajesh! movie is Mana meccida Sose)
  2. Joteyali .. Jote Joteyali iruvenu (The magic of this song needs no words, its popularity speaks for itself, one can see the magic of SPB-SJ duo – movie is Geetha )
  3. Naguva Nayana Madhura Mouna (The picturization, music, the SPB-SJ duo… its heavenly.. from the movie Pallavi Anupallavi)
  4. Malle hoova Maale Mudisi (A very touchy romantic number, music by IR, wonderful lyrics, from the movie Prema Raaga Haadu Gelati)
  5. Nooru Janmaku Nooraaru Janmaku (Another poetic number sung by Rajesh Krishnan from the movie America America)
  6. Preeti Eke Bhumi melide (From the movie Excuse-Me – a musical tribute all the way through)
  7. Preetse anta Praana tinno (Again from Excuse-Me, Bombay Jayashree pulling the strings of your heart)
  8. Jeeva Hoovaagide Bhaava Jenaagide (An awesome duet by Dr Raj-SJ, music by IR, beautiful lyrics, you can almost forgive Dr. Raj crooning.. “I laaaav youuuuu… I laaaav youuuuu”, movie is Nee Nanna Gellalaare)
  9. Hamsave Hamsave Haadu Baa (From the movie Gatti Mela, Sonu Nigam baffled me, Chitra is just too good)
  10. Priya Priya Ninna Nota Priya (The music and lyrics by Hamsalekha leaves an indelible print on the mind.. kept me in the clouds for days… oops.. movie is Ksheera Saagara)
  11. Eno Moha Eko Daaha (An evergreen seductive duet by Dr. Raj-VJ from Keralida Simha)
  12. Neela Megha Gaali Beesi (Another of the evergreen SPB-SJ Duets from Anand, listen to this music in a silent room… its magical)
  13. Nammura Mandaara Hoove (Probably among the most famousest of all SPB Solos, the heroine is almost forgettable, movie – Aparichita)
  14. Usire Usire Usiraagu (A techno romantic song from the movie Deadly Soma sung by Karthik and Bombay Jayashree)
  15. Gap Chup Gap Chup Pranayada Raaga (I remember listening to this song over and over again.. from the Movie Nalla, sung by the Unni Krishnan and Harini duo)
  16. Tam nam Tam nam Nanni Manasu (Started with PBS, and will pause at PBS-SJ duet from Eradu Kanasu, simply superb)

The list is endless actually, and ever changing, in that, more and more songs are added on! Well guess these should suffice for the time being. I already have ’em playing on in the background.. which again is another reason for me to stop writing.. gotto listen you see 😉

Oct 27

Boom-busty Bollywood!!

Once upon a time, there was a land called Bollywood! It was famed all around the world as one of the busiest filmland, where everyday someone or the other was doing something or the other, which did not make sense, to either them or the rest of the world! Nevertheless, sense was never a criteria and all that mattered was that someone must be doing something! Now in this melee, there were a few mutants that actually started making sense in what they were doing but they did not last long! Before long they were all forgotten and the film land again went back to being senseless and everyone lived stupidly and worthlessly ever after!!!!
It again had been a long time since I wrote anything.. and some of my friends had started sending me hate mails! They were very gory and scared me and eventually made me write out a column for all those who regularly read it (now.. I tend to do a lot of imaginations.. so don’t get hung up on the numbers). Infact some of them even threatened to send me entire collections of Me-“ghana” naidu and Mallika sherawat’s videos! Now before things could turn that violent and nasty, I decided to jump in and end the crisis. Now exactly what it is that scares me about the recent “bombs” that the bollywood is dropping (and the ones my readers threatened me with), is very hard to point out! (Now this, I realize is a paradox. For there is absolutely nothin’ in ’em thatz hard to point out!) One thing is for sure that, what they lack in acting they more than make up in their oomphs! (am sure the maker wud have exclaimed “oops” the day he made ’em!). It takes a knack unsurpassable by anyone other than Ms. Sherawat to turn a beautiful romantic story as Eric Seagel’s “Love Story” into a disaster like “Khwaish” that almost had me puking everywhere! Oh! now I hear Himan”shoo” crying.. there.. there.. don’t u cry! You really had my jaws drop and eyes wide open till they dehydrated! Now, that acting which u did was really “to die for”. Your acting in “Rain”, especially when you dance around in the bath tub, has saved my life! I mean that thing what you did, infact sent a rabid, wildly mad and completely senseless buffoon running for cover! I owe it to you dude!!
You know, I really am all for passing a law, that should make the worst actors in the industry to be tied up to a pin cushion, with all the pins turned upwards, and play back to back all of their movies. And I am pretty sure, that they’d prefer sittin’ on the pins than have their brains busted by their so called acting skills. What has me really worried is that the all pervading sense of competition among the Indians, seems to be showing out even in the movies that Bollywood is churning out! Before long, it was Ms. Sherawat who used to gimme nightmares, but then came along Ms. Meghana Naidu (I knew there was something in the name!!) and before I could swoon down into a coma, the nail in the coffin was Payal Rohatgi! I mean.. can anyone actually blame even the stone faced Jatin for showing such constipated expressions?!! There were moments, when Ms. Rohatgi was trying to seduce him with her expressive eyes! Believe me, I haven’t cringed as much even while watching a horror movie! “door dus cities tak jahan bhi baccha rota hai, to baap bolta hai.. beta so jaa nahin to payal aajayegi!”
Now, what has my overly active imagination running wild as a mad dog, is the thought of casting all these madames with all those Mess(y)ieurs into one single movie! And then, we could use that to torture the most nastiest criminals into confession and even use it as a WMD (as I always say.. mass beats mass)! Or else, it would just turn out to be yet another senseless thing that everyone else in the industry is doing! Oh Well!

Oct 20

A ha(e)irless throne!

I have come to a foregone conclusion that there is no point in worrying about something that is for-gone! Its an eventuality that one knows will happen! So why bother about it! Not to mention that bothering only brings it closer to becoming true! Wonderin’ what I am yappin’ about at this time? Well.. its about follicle regression in the upper cranium area of an otherwise lucrative region of my body!!! Well if am balding.. then hell.. I am gonna be sophisticated about that!!
For one thing.. I did have my moments of glory with my hair! Well you can believe or faint but if you were to look at my pic as a 6 yr old wearing a safari suit and a golden chain, you would see the prominent crown of tufts atop my head! Then the time passed… and so did the hairs!! And yeah..there were days when I used to harp on and sing about the lost treasure… E mere pyaare badan.. E mere ujde chaman.. tujhpe tel kurbaan!
My mom tried every known methods and options only to tear her hair in despair! The contrast being that her hair stuck to the roots..and mine were more than glad to take their place!! My friends did their share in contributing to this excessive recession that I was going into.. what with their piling their problems on the vacant sites that were now open! You know.. now that I think of it.. it is just that! There is something about this baldness that actually sends a signal out to people… “hey all u cry babies.. herez a sucker for ur stories! So come and weep ur hearts out on his shoulders.. (or probably his head! as if it wasn’t enough that water washed it everyday!). Some said it was the genes, (darn these damn genes… they never get ’em right! Am sure they mixed things up and started sheddin’ my hair.. instead of something ‘else’-which I leave it to the overactive imagination of my readers to figure out.. or if u can’t, u are gladly welcome to tear my hairs over it!!!)
Now balding isn’t really such a big problem, if it wasn’t accompanied with its loving friend called “bulging”. Especially in my case, my body seems to make up with what its losing on the top, by gaining all around my girth! This logic, doesn’t seem to quite work out in my favor!
Well all said and done.. the person whoever said that “Baldness establishes the masculinity of a man, but only diminishes his chances of proving it” was so darn right.. I’d shed a hair or two for those words! Oops.. here they go!

Oct 20

My brother’s weddin’!!!

Sooo… whatz keepin’ me busy these days! Well.. for one its the work.. and for another its my laziness… but the most important thing is.. MY TRIP TO INDIA!!!! (*cheers, applauses.. and fans shriekin’ and tearin’ their hairs out!!!*) Oh! yeah.. good ol’ nation.. and good ol’ people.. good ol’ brother now gettin’ married.. in the same good ol’ way! aaah! I can almost smell the whiff of the matrimonial air around me. Boy! am I excited?!! Ofcourse I am!! Now that hez gettin’ married.. guess whoz the best man 😉 !!! (* More cheers.. applauses.. and fans shriekin’ and faintin’*) Now.. now.. pipe down y’all. I ain’t gonna be free around to sign on all ur autographs.. or pose for pics with you!! But tell ya what! I’ll let ya all have a glimpse of me when y’all come to the weddin’ !!
Well.. am already excitedly planning my stay in bangalore.. the things am gonna do and the ppl. am gonna see! But then with hardly a fortnight’s stay out there.. am already beginning to wonder if they will work out! You know.. thatz the hardest part! There is just never enough time! And especially when you are with your people, the time is one thing that just doesn’t wanna root down its goddamn butt and stay put! Well.. while it wasn’t still sure whether I would come for the wedding or not, I was eager to lap up atleast a week’s time if available. And now that I got 2 weeks, somehow, everything seems still less! The only thing that seems to grow is the longing… for my mother’s delicious dishes, her laughter.. at my *come kick-me* silly jokes, my buddies, and our hangouts.. the same good ol’s…the same good ol’s!